Tag, You're Suspended!
Yes, that’s right the game of tag has been banned at Kent Gardens elementary school in McLean, Virginia. Robyn Hooker, principal and anti-fun coordinator says that running, dodging, chasing and tagging followed by screaming “You’re IT!” has gotten out of hand and will not be allowed during recess until further notice.
Now is it just me or in an attempt to keep kids safe are we basically allowing them no opportunity to be kids? Mrs. Hooker would have pooped her knickers if she saw the games we played when I was in elementary school. Here are a few examples, and I am not making these up for comedy, this is actually a short list of what we did:
- King of the Hill – There was a small hill in the back corner of our elementary school, about 20 of us would scramble to get to the top and the person on top would do everything in his power to throw you back to the bottom. By throw you back to the bottom I mean the person on the top would grab, push, throw and kick you to get you off the top of the mountain, last one without a broken bone was “King” of the mountain.
- The Sky is Falling – You know those really hard red rubber playground balls? Well we would all stand in a group and someone would throw one of those up into the air as high as they could and scream "THE SKY IS FALLING!", the person who got hit on the head with it would be the next thrower. Compressed vertebrae were all part of the action. A short lived variation of this game substituted a rock for the ball, but even we were smart enough to recognize the amount of blood associated with a head wound and went back to the ball after one round.
- Knees – Yes it is very simple to play. The sole rule was if you fell off your feet as a result of being punched behind the knee you were out until the next round.
- Wall Ball – Again, utilizing the red playground balls a thrower would stand about 15 feet away from a bunch of people lined up against the wall. He would then throw the balls as hard and as fast as he could and try to hit someone on the wall. Now with movement being limited to sideways only, you would inevitable end up tripping over the person beside you, catching a ball in the face and then smacking your head against the wall behind you.
These games are just what we came up with, I am leaving out the sadistic games that the Gym Teacher used to put us through (dodge ball anyone). My point is, kids are going to find ways to play, and every single one of those ways contains some inherent manner in which to get hurt. Maybe from now on for recess we should just wrap our kids in foam and make them sit in the grass singing Hippy songs, this of course assuming they aren’t hit by a run away comet. Telling kids they can’t play tag is as ridiculous as all the other modern philosophies of over shadowing our kids with protection. Yes we need to be the ever watchful eye and steer them clear of danger when possible, and I understand the inherent difficulty with managing 900 kids on the playground at once, but banning games like tag is a band aid to a much larger issue, not enough grass to play in.
Mrs. Hooker’s decision gets five dodge ball’s to the face out of five